February Comics & Jokes

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February 2012 Issue:

The Scoop: Standby Generation May Be Vital to Your Business

Casters 101

Revolutionary 'Nest' Thermostat Sold Out in 2011

Climbing the Corporate Ladder? A Lateral Move May Be A Better Choice

An iPad or a tablet? It's A Matter of Lifestyle

February Celebrity Birthdays

February Comics & Jokes

The Lighter Side of Life

Inspiring Music

A minister was wondering how to ask the congregation to come up with more money for repairs to the church.

And he was annoyed to find that the regular organist was sick and a substitute had been brought in. The substitute wanted to know what to play. "Here's a copy of the service," he said impatiently. "But you'll have to think of something to play after I make the announcement about the finances."

During the service, the minister said, "Brothers and Sisters, we are in great difficulty; the roof repairs cost twice as much as we expected, and we need $4,000 more. Any of you who can pledge $100, please stand up."

At that moment, the organist played "The Star Spangled Banner."

Job Interview

Reaching the end of a job interview, the HR person asked a young Engineer fresh out of MIT, "And what starting salary were you looking for?"

The Engineer said, "In the neighborhood of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package."

The interviewer said, "Well, what would you say to a package of 5-weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50 percent of salary and a company car, say a red Corvette?"

The Engineer sat up straight and said, "Wow! Are you kidding?"

And the interviewer replied, "Yeah, but you started it."

Kenny and the Donkey

A city boy, Kenny, moved to the country and bought a donkey from an old farmer for $100. Early in the morning, the farmer drove over to Kenny's.

"Sorry son," the farmer said," the donkey died."

Kenny asked for his money back, but the farmer said he already spent it.

Kenny said, "OK then, just unload the donkey. I'll raffle him off."

A month later the farmer met up with Kenny, who said he sold 500 raffle tickets at $2 each and made a profit of $898."

"Didn't anyone complain because the donkey was dead?" the farmer asked.

"Just the guy who won. So I gave him his two dollars back!"

(Disclaimer: Reid Supply Company, in no way or form, condones the sale of any deceased farm animals. Reid Supply Company thinks that Kenny, although very clever, was probably doing a bad thing. Thank you.)